Smell your forbidden flowers and feed your fantasies
We all have a secret garden, the realm of our juicy fantasies and deep desires. And although we don't always act on them - thank goodness, mine could get me arrested - we should at least try to own them. Yes, they may be smutty, kinky or downright dirty, but they are you; an important part of your sensual being. Sadly, after centuries of being shamed into self-censorship as women, we tend to repress our fantasies. We nip them in the bud before they can blossom, giving away our power without realizing it. But it's never too late! Have you been feeling dull lately; are you sleepwalking through life? Time to rewild* your secret garden and reclaim your sensuality. Here's how:
Dig for your romantic roots What lays at the roots of your first sexual awakening? In my case, it was my mom's smutty romance novels. The brooding buildup, the detailed scenarios, the cruel pirates with killer jawlines; these stories helped me discover my secret garden (and cum all over it). Research has shown that men primarily get off on visual stimuli, whereas our sexuality is much more layered and complex. Erotic romance novels work for us because they nourish a female need for sexy storytelling. What scenarios used to turn you on? Resow those wild, erotic seeds and own your (filthy) fantasies. You may even want to invite a pirate. Or two.
Water your garden Your desires are like plants; you need to water them. And I mean that quite literally: get wet, girl! The secret to unleashing your juice - aka female ejaculation fluid - is giving yourself permission to flow. That, and finding the perfect sex toy. After all, with our sexual parts being quite hidden, it makes perfect sense to use some proper 'tools' to explore that secret garden down below. And believe me, flowing freely and without shame is one of the most empowering things you can do for yourself. To (mis)quote Cardi and Megan: bring a bucket and a hose for your wet-ass garden!
Smell the forbidden flowers Non-monogamy, orgies, sex with a stranger; do you find yourself 'editing' your desires because you feel ashamed? Are you trying to stay away from these 'forbidden flowers' in your secret garden? Don't! If you flip through 'My Secret Garden', Nancy Friday's classic 1970s collection of women's sexual fantasies, you'll soon realize that most women have taboo-related desires that easily top yours. So go ahead, smell your forbidden flowers and feed your fantasies. Yes, you can pick them to share with your lover, maybe even indulge in a bit of roleplay. But sometimes it's enough to let them blossom freely within the safety of your garden walls - there where the wild things are.
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Building bridges
From the Erasmus Bridge and the Mercedes-Benz Museum to Qatar’s metro network; Ben van Berkel’s iconic landmarks bring people together in rapturous beauty, again and again. I talked with the Dutch architect and educator about sensuality, ‘healthy’ buildings and the remarkable parallels between our designs.
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More than a feeling
Don’t ignore your emotions; they are much more powerful than you can imagine. By linking the magical world of emotions with hard science, Dutch scientist Pierre Capel, professor emeritus in experimental immunology, shows us the consequences of our feelings and the power of our minds. The message: we can do much more than we think. “Meditate. It’s the single best thing you can do for your health.”
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Marlies Says
Keto curious?
The fact that I feel bikini-confident all year round is, of course, a nice bonus. But for me, the biggest payoff of following the keto diet is the way it optimizes my health and gives me tons of energy.
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Marlies Says
Super (skin) food
‘If you can’t eat it, why put it on your skin?’. I pretty much live by this beauty adage. After all, with your skin being one of your body’s largest organs, anything – and I mean anything! – you put onto your skin will end up in your bloodstream.
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